Balance Buster: Comparison

I am in no way, shape or form the expert on balance. I want to co-author this blog in order to talk about the journey toward one of my life goals--to MAINTAIN balance. This is something I struggle with on a daily basis and I experience most moments of major self-discovery when I write and reflect.

Also, I want to make a disclaimer that, in contrast to Greg's posts, mine are going to seem uber-fluffy and touchy-feely. But hey, that's just how I am...and frankly, that's why we work so well. Right honey? I give Greg the little lift he needs and he brings me back down to earth when my head is WAY too far in the clouds.

Today I want to focus on the following definition of balance (the first on the list): A state of equilibrium or parity characterized by cancellation of all forces by equal opposing forces. My least favorite, and as those who are close to me can attest to, the most difficult and damaging of my "opposing forces" is an ugly, ugly feeling called jealousy. It has affected my life in many different ways, but I am going to focus on the form I often struggle with the most: comparison. I know it's only human to compare, but I do it to a fault. This has put strain not only on relationships, but also on my personal goals and dreams. I compare the way I look, the way I speak or sing, how much money I have, and even my personal faith with others, often on a more than daily basis. It's really hard to feel in balance, let alone adequate, when I consistently compare myself with someone who, in my opinion, is skinnier, prettier, more naturally talented, wealthier, or even at a more mature stage in her faith. I do this with friends, strangers, and even celebrities. It's a nasty habit. This--comparison--is the opposing force I need to cancel, or at least tame.

The one slightly positive angle is this - I find myself making comparisons in the areas where I feel least adequate and most unbalanced. For example, if I'm feeling out of balance in my physical appearance and uncomfortable with the way I look, I'll find myself pining away at pictures of beautiful women. Or if I'm feeling low in my spiritual life, I'll see women who were once spiritual mentors and feel jealous of their faith. This jealousy causes me to feel EVEN WORSE and more inadequate in these areas. I feel more ugly. I feel less spiritual.

One of the WORST instigators of this horrible affliction I have is Facebook. I am always drawn to the status messages and photo albums of the numerous people I regularly compare myself to. Not to mention that, for me, social networking sites are the cause of more wasted time than anything else...including television. Curse you addictive networking sites. Curse you!

So the ultimate question is, how can I tame this opposing force of comparison? Does anyone else struggle with this?